oh, i already miss you singing like this overthephone.

Thursday, Apr. 25, 2002 | 2:38 p.m.

i hopelessly, helplessly wonder why everything's gotta change around me. i'd tell it to your face, but you lost your face along the way. and i'd say it on the phone if i thought you were alone. [why do things have to change?]

today i made a move. i took a baby step. but i went forward, nonetheless. i was afraid of telling her myself. so i went to her other half, the one who filled my position when i was let go. i thought i was being a good friend. i displayed a greater amount of maturity than i knew i possessed. because i know that it will be sweeter coming from her instead of me. i know she will take it better. i think i made the right choice. i don't know what will come of this. and i don't really care. because at least now she knows about the rumors. and at least there is no way she can think i am passing judgment on her if they are actually true. because i had the decency to let someone else handle it--a girl who, as hard as it is for me to admit, is better-equipped to deal with this than me, because she's on the inside, and i am on the outside, looking in.

i am proud of myself.

go on drone